“It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity, it was the season of light, it was the season of darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair.” –Charles Dickens, A Tale of Two Cities

The school year is finished. And while there is a sense of relief that this chapter of my life has come to an end, I’m still trying to grasp the year in its entirety. How can you possibly put into words a journey in which you have experienced so many conflicting emotions? How do you balance drawing strength from the visible impact you have made with having peace with the invisible seeds planted that you can only hope one day take root? How do you properly say goodbye and put the work you have done to rest? How do you really convey what it has all been about?

You be honest; you be genuine; you be real. I think that’s the only way. And for me, this is what that looks like . . .

The year has been about struggle. It’s been about fighting daily battles. It’s been about rejoicing in triumph and allowing yourself grace in defeat. It’s been about small victories. It’s been about learning from your mistakes and embracing your weaknesses. It’s been about gaining knowledge and applying it as wisdom. It’s been about how to accept responsibility for your actions and how to develop mental fortitude. It’s been about learning what’s within your control and what’s beyond your control. It’s been about respect and loyalty and love. It’s been about how to act with a genuine heart and a pure motive. It’s been about trust and betrayal, abandonment and security. It’s been about how to be bold yet humble. It’s been about laughter and pain. It’s been about not allowing your past to define your future. It’s been about choosing to love yourself. It’s been about anger and joy, confusion and peace, regret and affirmation. It’s been about fighting your demons. It’s been about the power of redemption. It’s been about discovering meaning and value. It’s been about healing. It’s been about hope.

It’s been about choosing to see Jesus in their eyes and allowing them to see Jesus in mine. It’s been about taking the opportunity that I was given and being faithful until the end. It’s been about fighting the good fight, finishing the race, and keeping the faith. It’s been about pursing a purpose far greater than my own.

It’s been about eternity.

In the end, the journey has been heartbreaking and incredible and awe-inspiring. It has taught me about this life and the next. It has been everything I needed it to be and more. Most of all, it has been beautiful. So, so beautiful.

And for that, I’ll always be grateful.


2 thoughts on “Day 174–What It’s All About

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s